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Don't Look Downdontlookdown
dont look down
Shes hiding her heart behind the fortress walls
of her tightly compressed skin stretched over
her love starved skeleton; shes begging for redemption.
She lives on leftover wishes that have been thrown
away and rejected by shallow girls who have it all.
dont break now
the last timeyou laced my omelette
with sleeping pills
you trapped me in Bermuda
where the flames rose high
you let me fall asleep in a
black bin bag again
you gave me light
and death in a single polka
when the flames fought
and the moon found
she could die
then all was well
well was all and truly
next thing we're touchingyou put the moon out with your cigarette as everything around you began to dim. you stirred the stars around as your body swayed against the porch lights, as you lifted the twenty-sixer to your lips.
you turned to me and said, "lets show this world what we're made of."
lets fuckin' show them.
we had our first kiss right there.
honest to god,
i'm not colour-blind, i just see colourless colour
i'm not starry-eyed, i just reached out and tore the sky down the middle
i still remember the salt strewned in the air as we fucked on the shore. it was one of those days where there was a lulling silence, a silence so serene it was like you weren't there. the only sound that spun down my eardrums was the slow rotation of the world and your vocal chords whispering out hoarse i love yous. your eyes drowned my vision and roared like waves passed my eyelids
that was when i knew
as our clothes stuck to our ribcages
and drops of water hugged our hearts
we'd fuckin' show the
what we didn't want came trueit was you against me and me against the wall
pushing and shoving into me, forcing apart my legs
i felt my hips dig into yours and my head hit the flat surface
i screamed and screamed and screamed but nothing happened except
the touch of your lips against my skin, and under it the breaking of my brittle bones
you clasped your hands around my throat and held tight
the air began to close off, and my lungs felt weak
tears appeared and bruises started to swell all over my body
"stop" i plead, but you just laughed
and unbuttoned my blouse.
it were days like today where i felt
used, broken and too fucked up
to even glance at myself in the mirror
you always told me that you liked a girl
who had lines around her eyes, broken ribs
and a punctured heart inside of her
but i never knew you would make me just like one of them
it's been twenty seven days since i've seen
the sunrays through the cracks of my window
a rush of air down my throat
and a laughter playin
losing everything i never hadit's an early morning as the sun is rising, stepping into my mother's room and moving towards her bed, careful not to disturb the dark shadows on the walls, or the lulling silence that's filling the steps between us, i ask her when she wearily opens her eyes, "why was i born?"
her face held no expression, and she didn't reply
she didn't reply
i might as well not have gotten out of bed today.
i might as well be -
and sometimes as i'm sitting in the passenger seat, i lose track of where i'm headed. i lose track of the fact that i'm moving, i'm moving somewhere slowly across a map. i'm moving with the world, and i'm just one person out of so many. so fucking many. i watch the rode beneath the tires blur passed us. i watch the clouds drift along with us, the trees look like ghosts. i feel the time move along with us, as the sun falls to the floor and gives up letting the stars take it's place. the moon has painted my skin white, just as i sputter out my words and let them fade
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